Originally posted here

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Here is a quick timeline of the gaming life of a former Sega “fanboy”. In writing this I discovered quite a bit about my own hypocrisies and double-standards…coming to the conclusion that we should all give up hating this console or that console, this company or that company, Sonic or Mario etc etc. They all have their value, so we should just enjoy it while we can. Respect each other’s bloody decisions!

Born December 1982

Premature by 3 months, apparently offset by my mum walking past a Space Invaders arcade machine and having an urge to play.

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Age 2 Learning to walk (handy for future trips to EB games) and grasp items, making full use of all digits and the all-important imposable thumb: hence receiving early training for future analogue sticks and shoulder buttons.

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Age 3 Development of spacial, logic, and talking skills which will eventually be tested by Game Boy Tetris, Facebook Poker and Yahoo Chat.

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Primary School

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Age 6 Mum bought me my first console: the Sega Master System II. Hence the commencement of my Master Gamer Fourth Dan daily lessons and practice where only intense discipline and self-control could help me beat Enduro Racer, until I discovered the cheat code.

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Age 9 Learnt about self-consciousness and wanted to have Sonic’s spiky hair and red sneakers. Had to settle instead for mummy-parted bowlcut and Reebok Pumps, which at least helped me jump really high of course.

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Age 10 Game Boy craze hits school, with annoying kids shouting in my ear about where to place the blocks as I stare fixatedly at the wonderful muddy yellow and black screen. Learnt a valuable life lesson here about the virtues of solo gaming.

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Age 11 Hatred of Nintendo is firmly developed through Sega’s slogan propaganda and the coolness of Michael Jackson’s Moonwalker. Who wants to play rubbish like Super Metroid when I’ve got 16 bit ‘Smooth Criminal’ as background music? Eh?

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High School

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Age 14 My first computer, a Pentium 133 which is SO good for learning stuff with Encarta 95, getting angry at Word, and playing Sim City 2000 – the beginning of PC game addiction. Windows 3.11 is HOT. For some reason it keeps crashing on me for no good reason and I have to get it repaired (at least) 3 times. Crucial training for the world we now live in: to think school assignments were handwritten or even worse, typewritten(!) before this – crazy.

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Age 15 Learnt about the valour and integrity in taking sides in the early console wars: Sega Saturn vs Sony Gaystation. Developed thick skin and the ability to tell convincing stories about Sega’s prowess and world domination. Gameplay over graphics! And anyone who doesn’t agree isn’t a hardcore gamer: get out!

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Age 16 Felt loss, sadness, and turmoil through the defeat of the Saturn. Nintendo-hate intensifies because of the Nintendo 64 (Mario 64 “isn’t even that great”). Confusion arises because I really liked Metal Gear Solid, an exclusive game on THE ENEMY.

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Age 17 Feelings of redemption through the promise of the Dreamcast. Anti-Sony emotions intensify as the PS2 hijacks it a year later with a far more powerful system. How dare they! First kiss with a girl named Grace. Hard to afford games on a McDonald’s wage. Addicted to Champ Manager as I guide Arsenal to European Cup glory. Learnt to drive thanks to years of Daytona USA and Sega Rally at the arcades.

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Uni

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Age 20 Forced to swallow one’s pride through the intense and amazing gameplay experience of GTAIII on the PS2. I end up buying it as fierce memories of Sega’s demise start to slowly fade. Entered an experimental phase in life by trying out all sorts of new stuff, like cigarettes, alcohol, drugs, LAN gaming and Counterstrike. Learnt new jargon: ‘camper’, as well as the humiliation of being noob-knifed.

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Age 21 Becoming a local master in Pro Evolution Soccer. What the hell is Microsoft doing? The XBox is CRAP!!! Stay away! Stick with computers Bill Gates you nerd!

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Age 22 World comes crumbling down as I am beaten (comprehensively) for the first time ever by a mate’s Korean cousin who is a Pro Evo BEAST. Had to ask myself serious personal questions: Who am I? Where do I want to be in life? Do I choose a life of living my passion at the cost of financial security, or do I get a 9 to 5 job and climb the career ladder and sacrifice the things I love? Is there a balance? Started playing guitar: nothing at all like Guitar Hero.

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Adult Life

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Age 24 Working full time (ahem, 9 to 5) but feeling born again through the wonderful DS and Nintendo Wi-Fi Connection. Lost countless battles of Pokemon to kids 10 years younger than I am. Soon to be a 360 owner through the beauty of BioShock and the sheer potential in playing Pro Evo on XBox Live – and climbing the career (360 achievements) ladder to be NUMBER ONE. If I keep training my brain every day with the DS, it’s only a matter of time.